Throughout the book, Bethenny mentions 10 rules to live, breathe and abide by in order to become "naturally thin" without ever trying.  I want to share these with you because I think they are very important.  If you follow these rules - you will never be counting calories, binging or self-loathing EVER AGAIN.  Doesn't that sound fabulous?!  Read on to know the secrets...

Your Diet Is A Bank Account
This simply means, balance what you put into your mouth.  If you have a carb-loaded meal for breakfast, balance it out with a low-carb, protein-filled lunch.  If you splurge on that cookie post-lunch, skip the dessert or glass of wine later.  This is balancing your diet - you will likely get all the food groups, nutrients, etc. that you need all in a day's time without ever feeling deprived.

I like this rule because there is room to mess up.  We are not perfect and that goes for our diets too.  The wiggle room this rule allows prevents you from ever feeling guilty about a food choice.  It's OK to eat the donut, don't beat yourself up.  No one food makes you fat and you'll always have another chance to pick a healthier option.

Remember, checks and balances here people!  If you have a cocktail party to go to at night, remember that and plan ahead.  Eat lots of veggies, fruits and proteins throughout the day to make up for the empty alcohol calories you are likely to consume later on!  And remember, NOTHING is forbidden here - everything in moderation.

Eating will become a lot less stressful if you follow this rule.  It will free you from ever counting calories again.  Isn't that quite an incentive?!  I think so!

You Can Have It All, Just Not All At Once
This rule means you can have anything you want, just not all in one sitting.  If you want fries, you are more than welcome to get those fries!  Just don't supersize the order with a double cheese burger and a shake.  Our body needs treats every now and again to make sure we don't binge later. But treating ourselves does not mean go eat two days worth of calories in one sitting.

Once you practice this rule a while, you'll start to not crave bad foods all together.  Eat a little at a time to satisfy your cravings and then stop.  After two or three bites, the food you are eating usually starts to taste ordinary, meaning it doesn't taste as AMAZING as it did when you first put it in your mouth.  This is your time to stop.  Bethenny calls this the point of diminishing return.  The point your food satisfies your craving (usually after 3 bites), stop!  Easy as that.  You got your sugar or salt fix, but with hardly any calories!

Remember, all foods are there for the taking, just not all at once - MODERATION is key.

Taste Everything, Eat Nothing
This rule might seem like rule #2, but it actually isn't.  This rule is in place to take all anxiety and stress out of going out to dinner with friends or attending a cocktail party - if you are like me or Bethenny, sometimes its tough to be excited about going out when you know there's a likely chance that you will break your diet.  And then a more likely chance of eating and drinking everything on the table.

You no longer have to think this way!  You are allowed to go out and live your life and be excited about it, but while doing it, you will taste everything, but actually eat nothing. 

To do this, order soup before your meal or order three apitizers for everyone to share.  Take two to three bites or until your point of diminishing return and then stop!  Therefore, you are left completely satisfied, but not bloated, puffy, disgusting, etc - you know what I'm talking about.  You will feel confident when you wake up the next morning and proud of yourself for going out and not spoiling everything you've worked so hard for.

Remember, eat steak, eat spinach dip, eat lo mein, but only a little of each!  Same goes with the wine...have a glass, but not 5!  You'll feel much better with yourself after and not have wasted thousands of calories you could have potentially consumed eating and drinking out.

Pay Attention
I'm sure you've heard of MINDFUL eating, correct?  Mindful eating is when you sit down, enjoy the feeling, smell, texture of your food, all the while being very aware of how your body feels and the environment that you are eating in.  It all makes a huge difference when not overeating.

Eating on the go, standing up, in the car, at your work desk - this is all MINDLESS eating and you are almost always going to over eat, because you will not be paying attention to what you put into your mouth.  PLUS, on the go, getting healthy veggies, fruits, whole grains and proteins that your body needs aren't usually readily available, making it very hard to provide the right kind of nourishment and energy to your body.

Always pay attention to what you are eating, what time you are eating, where you are eating, etc. - it will help you enjoy your food more, consume only enough for your body to rejuvenate itself and help you feel and look better in the end.  It really helps the mental battle - what's most likely the underlying foundation to your food phobias.  PAYING attention will help you stick to nutritious choices and prevent you from binging - the key, you will soon learn, to becoming naturally thin and happy with your body.

Downsize Now!
I always say moderation is key.  If you're going to get the body you want and finally free yourself from a lifetime of dieting, you cannot keep eating the same giant portions.  You have to downsize immediately.  If you are used to eating an entire bowl of pasta or a steak the size of your plate - you are never going to become naturally thin if you do not change your habits.  Check portion sizes.  The amount of pasta you should have in one sitting is about a cup, a steak should be about the size of your palm.

Downsizing might be difficult at first if you are used to eating large portions at every meal.  But from talking to people who have lost weight, they agree that this was the first change they made and without cutting anything out of their diets, the pounds just melted off.  It's like a miracle fix.

Try it for a couple weeks and see what a difference eating in moderation can do for you.  You can still eat anything you want, but only eat 1/4 or a 1/2 of it and save the rest for later.  It will make a huge difference in how you look come a month from now.

Aren't you excited that something as easy as cutting your portion in half can shave off tons of pounds!?  Pretty cool, I think.  No counting calories necessary.  That's a blessing in itself.

Cancel Your Membership in the Clean Plate Club
This is a given - DO NOT EVER, I mean EVER eat everything on your plate.  Apply all the above rules and you never will.  When you were little, being in the clean plate club was cool.  Your mom would encourage you to eat everything on your plate so you could grow and be strong.  You might have even been rewarded with dessert, right?  Well this is absolutely not cool anymore.  Let that memory go.  It does not and will NEVER apply to you again.  This is no longer a good thing!

We are older now and our metabolisms are no longer as great as they once were - we need to finally accept this!  Unfortunately.  And the Clean Plate Club only gets you big hips, a jiggly stomach and low self-esteem.  To me, that doesn't sound like a fun club to be in.

So stop right now.  Only eat two or three bites of each food group on your plate.  You'll be satisfied, nourished and won't feel guilty afterward.

Check Yourself before You Wreck Yourself
To everyone, one or more of these rules will hit home.  Each and every one of us have a weakness that has wrecked us for so long.  This is mine.  Check yourself before you wreck yourself means that you recognize the point in which you are about to let go and participate in an all-out binge.  If you have done this before, you know what I mean.  It's very much closely tied to binge-eating disorder and is deeply rooted in the mind.  It is very hard to overcome, but if you do, you will see IMMEDIATE changes.

I couldn't believe when Bethenny touched on this in her book.  When something like this happens to you, you feel disgusted and think you are the only one in the entire world doing this.  Bethenny says she had many nights where she didn't eat before going out to compensate for the alcohol she was going to consume.  But on her way home, she would stop at every market and late-night deli and pick up chips, muffins, anything junk food related that she has shunned from her daily diet.  Does this sound familiar to anyone?  I suffered from an eating disorder in college and got down to my lowest weight.  After years of dieting, counting calories and spending day in and day out in the gym, my body became exhausted from all the destruction I was putting it through.  The result?  One day I woke up and wanted to eat EVERYTHING.  This transformed my ano/gym obsessed routine into another type of eating disorder...I just didn't know so many others had the same issue.

Binge eating is a HUGE problem.  Not only are you consuming tons of extra calories that you would not have previously consumed if you had just let yourself have a treat, but the quantity and type of food that you put in your body in such a short period of time wrecks havoc on your body.  If you've felt bloated, puffy and sluggish in the morning after a full-on binge,  your body is suffering from the mass amount of food you've shoved into it.  And c'mon, does bingeing really make sense?  You let go and eat one treat, but because you think you have wrecked your entire diet, why not eat the WHOLE bag, plus a combo, shake, chips, cookies and a coke?  It's nuts, but for some reason, if you have dieted and restricted yourself for so long, this is how the mind works. 

You have to re-train your body and mind to see ALL foods as energy and a way to keep yourself healthy.  You have to develop a good relationship with food, even with horrible, sugary foods that you have had off limits for years.  As I've said before, no ONE food makes you fat, but bingeing does.  Bingeing creates that yo-yo effect, which not only makes it harder for your body to lose the weight time and time again, but it really does take a toll on your health.  Habits like this lead to breathing and heart trouble, not too mention you are continuously putting toxins into your body that feed cancer cells.  I know it's far fetched to think that one or several binges can help develop serious health complications, but they can.

Before it gets any more out of hand, CHECK YOURSELF.  Recognize that point in which you are about to go off the deep end.  Take a step back and a deep breath, count to 30 slowly, and by the end of the 30 seconds, either the urge to eat everything in sight will subside, or you will realize that you really do want that treat.  At the end of the 30 seconds, if you really want that treat, eat it!  But those 30 seconds will make you realize that you only want the one treat, not 50 of them.  Taking a deep breath and stepping away from the situation alleviates the anxiety and almost brainwashing effect that comes over you when the binging kicks in.  Practice these tips and the next time you have the urge, you won't wreck yourself!

Know Thyself
This is a very important rule as well.  Know your body.  Know how it responds to certain foods.  Know how it responds in certain situations.  If you know how your body works and feels at all times, you can plan for difficult situations.  If you are like me, parties and eating out makes me anxious.  There's so many unhealthy options and who knows how many drinks I'm going to consume being out with old friends.  I'm always so scared that I'm going to overeat and drink.  Well, If I know this about myself, I plan ahead.  I allow myself two drinks and a few bites of several apps, THAT'S IT.  To some of you this might sound restrictive.  I mean so what, one night out won't hurt, right?  Wrong - for me it could.  I need to stick to these rules in order to check myself before I wreck myself.  Whatever works for you, do it.

Some of you can't handle not knowing how much butter the cook is using.  Some of us work too much and don't have time to cook.  Some of us have children and can't get to the gym enough.  Plan ahead.  Know yourself.  Make Sunday cook days for the entire week.  Get up an hour early to get an early morning run in.  Ask the cook to hold the butter for your entre.  Whatever it is - know thyself, don't fight it.  Work with your body to help get it to its most healthy state.




There are two more rules in Bethenny's equation, Get Real and Good for You.  Rather than elaborate on those, I want to create the last rule that Bethenny vaguely touched on throughout her book, but a point that I think is most important and that I have struggled with while balancing my eating issues.  That is...

Live Your Life
For years, your life has revolved around food, the gym and how skinny you can become.  Everything you do, think and say has to do with these three things.  Sound familiar? For me, I'll be finishing a project at work before heading home and all I can think about is what I should do at the gym that night and how many calories I can burn.  I have skipped numerous parties and eating out with friends because I don't want to overdo it on calories from non-organic foods and sugary drinks.